I Don’t Have an Answer

It is the end of the year, 2021, and I don’t have an answer.

At this time, I usually choose to take time to reflect on the year in general and my life, specifically. How did I fair? Did I accomplish my goals? Did I care for my body, my health, my family, and my friends? Have my priorities shifted? What is important now?

“WOW! What a ride!!”, I’m tempted to exclaim this year! I feel like I’ve been riding the Cannibal or the Manta roller coasters over … and over … and over!

Mid-December has been my traditional time to center myself, to check my Internal Guidance System. I trust my Guidance Center; some call it intuition or that quiet little voice that nudges us forward or back. Some call it Higher Power, or God.

At this very moment, right Now, I’m wondering if I might have a conversation with my Internal Guidance Center.

I’m wondering if I Am a conspiracy theorist, a True Believer that my Country is flying apart at the seams, that young Americans really have been (over the past twenty years) conditioned toward Socialism, that The Vaccine is about control of people’s will and the population overall, and that I can no longer trust the government.

There was a time in my Life when I lost Me. I allowed myself to be controlled by another. I allowed myself to be so controlled and…