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How Can You Still Love Your Abuser?
Admitting that you still have feelings for the person who abused you, even that you still love him or that you may miss him from time to time, is nothing to be ashamed of.
Do you feel guilty and wonder what’s wrong with you, when someone asks “How can you still love your abuser?”. She may even remind you of the time you called her for help, or when she met you in the emergency room.
There is no reason for guilt. Your feelings are normal…even common.
You approached the relationship honestly, genuinely offering up your love, trust, and vulnerability to someone who made you believe he was doing the same. Once the abuse started, the abuser pulled you back in by reverting to the “Nice Guy”. He sweetly and apologetically punctuated his darkness with blindingly bright acts of “love”, long enough to restore your faith in him and the relationship.
We’ve all been there and we chose to believe that side. We chose to believe that he loved us; over and over and over…
Love does not stop just because someone hurts you.
Not everyone understands that statement. As a survivor of abuse, you do.
Abuse survivors tend to be compassionate people, caregivers with a huge capacity for love. We believed we could help our abuser change. We were dedicated to…
